the FAQs are pretty funny, too- and no, i'm not the "Mitchell" who hates Halloween about half way down the list. man, would i LOVE to use this one on a few would-be engraving clients:
"Do you do special request pumpkins for people?"
Yes. But only if your request is that I carve whatever I like, whenever I like.
Another favorite:
"I am just so jealous of people like you who are born with the talent to do something without ever having to put any effort into developing a skill since you have obviously been magically blessed with abilities beyond those of regular people from the moment of birth. It deeply frustrates me that you do things effortlessly and have never had to study, practice, pay for art school, or work a day in your life while I, on the other hand, try to do something creative and must face the horror of it not automatically turning out perfect right away. Must be nice."
You forgot to mention how I have no appreciation and take everything for granted.